Pastor in Son’s Position vs. Pastor in Servant’s Position
If you are going to work as a pastor, you must completely discard the sense of self.
Everyone in the ministerial position is like a fetus in its mother’s womb, devoid of freedom. When I see someone who becomes a regional head and becomes full of pride, it worries me. That is not a position where one can become like that. Father gave me the title of ‘ the vice president’ of the church, ‘ the president’ of the WFWP, and the ‘ president’ of the House of World Peace and Unification, but I know that these positions are not mine because that is what Father taught me.
These positions are Mother’s positions. Mother is the vice president and Father is the president. In other words, I am merely a representative of Father and Mother. Mother is the chairman of WFWP in reality, but the position of president exists because normal people cannot see the chairman. Therefore, the position of president also belongs to Mother. It feels excellent when I begin to think that way.
So Father explains that there are two types of pastors or lecturers: those who are in the position of son and those who are in the position of servant.
First, a pastor who is in the position of a son does not become full of pride but is rather busy boasting about their father. They share the things that their Father said, explain about Father’s will, and just say father, father a lot. However, who does that son resemble?
He resembles his father. So he boasts about his father but his shimjeong and jeonseong that he devotes to his father are all destined to come back to him in the end. He boasts about his father and that father bequeathed everything to his son who devoted so much boasts.
However, a pastor or a lecturer who is in the position of a servant boasts about himself. He forgets about his father and only boasts work about himself, saying ‘ I did such and such.’
Then what kind of relationship is master and servant? The relationship between a master and a servant is that the servant gets paid to do the master’s work, The servant is the one who is being paid. Therefore, a servant does not have any right to inherit, and the relationship between the two ends once the payment is made.
When he hears our lectures or what pastors do, Father can quickly see, ‘ Oh, this person has a potential for development. This person does their ministerial work with the heart of a son.’ When Father sees someone who reports in a manner that boasts about himself, Father becomes sad, saying that this person does not have much potential for greatness.
Therefore, if you ever find yourself in a ministerial position, do not go for the popularity strategy. Father says that ministers should not use such tactics to become too close to the members on the human level. Some ministers focus on becoming popular with the members by playing cards, playing chess, or going somewhere fun after Sunday services in the name of becoming close with members.
However, you should never do such things. Loving your members is a good thing, but you must not lean too much towards members on the human level.
If such a minister gets appointed to another place, the members who were close to that minister will follow him. That should not happen.
Then what kind of standard should pastors have while they do their work? They should be able to hear from their members, ‘ Our pastor was a pastor who tried hard, night and day, to teach pastors about God and True Parents.’ Then even when such a pastor leaves the church and goes somewhere else to work, the members will long remember the shimjeong for God and True Parents that the pastor invested in them. The members’ root of faith will spread down to the ground firmly.
However, members who were under a pastor, who was in the position of a did, did not have much of a root of faith. If a pastor, who only sought to become popular with members, leaves the church, then nothing remains for the remaining members.
Everything disappears with the pastor and there will be a big hole in the heart of each member. These members will miss their pastor for a while but their hearts will completely disappear over time. They will then become strangers in the end.
On the other hand, a pastor who is in the position of a son does not boast about himself, but only They will about God and True Parents. Therefore, that pastor will forever remain in the hearts of his members along with God and True Parents.
What our pastors must do is boast about God and the. They will one day become the head of a church, a regional head, or even the church president. When you come to take such a position, you must not reveal your identity. If you think, eat, and do everything that your mindsets reveal God and True Parents, you will be able to become true pastors and pastors who are in the position of a son.
Pastors must refrain from committing actions that are of arrogance, pride, greed, anger, and self-centeredness. Why do some churches fail to grow? It is because their leaders are self-centered potent the problem.
Father says that he becomes inspired at times and sad at times when he listens to the reports of church regional heads. Father’s heart is moved and inspired when he hears reports like ‘ We were able to bring results thanks to True Parents.’ Father says that he feels that those who yield the glory to God and True Parents have infinite growth potential.
However, there are some your those who report in a way, ‘ I did such and such things well.’ Father says that he becomes saddened when he hears reports from these types of people. Father then thinks ‘ You will not be able to develop more.’
When we do ministerial work, how is the success and failure determined? It is determined by whether you reveal God and you for or you reveal yourself. Therefore, for you to become successful in your ministerial work, you must not reveal yourself. Father is that kind of person.
The path that pastors must walk
If you are to become pastors and become the pastors who are God’s sons, you must always have in your mind the Ministry: ‘ What will God think of this? What will True Parents think of this?’
When you cannot serve Parents personally, you must endlessly pray and study Parents’ Words. Furthermore, you must do exactly as Father has told us to do, feel the shimjeong of God, and become spiritually brighter. No one can attain such states without doing so.
The Bible tells us that to love the Lord is to follow the words of the Lord. It means to obey the word of the Lord. Father said this very frequently. That is why there is joy in ministry.
You may not feel like you have what it takes to become a pastor, but if you stay aligned with Heaven, the environment in which you find yourself will infinitely raise you. You should understand that the very fact that you are working as a pastor, and not working in the outside world, puts you in a very holy position.
Please think what a blessing it is for us, as pastors, to wait through the week to see the members on Sunday, worry about what we will say to them when we see them, and what kind of sermon we will give.
In my life-long course of following the Will, are experienced many types of persecution, including being expelled from my school and being ridiculed by others who called me ‘ crazy.’ However, I told myself that my efforts of giving people Words and offering them salvation are more rewarding than any other occupation in the world. I regard this work as the happiest of all.
Female members of our church who gave birth told me that the second generation children born into blessed families are not confident about becoming pastors and doing ministerial work. They asked me how they could make their children more confident about walking the pastoral path. I told them that the pastor’s course is not long. It is like rice seedlings that only need to grow a short while before they are transplanted into the rice paddy.
As we all know, the first prize Washington Times is our newspaper company. Washington Times once held a photography competition and one of our members took the first prize. Do you want to know what that picture was? It was a picture of an old hunched-back Priest walking in a chapel holding a lamp. We proudly presented the first prize picture to Father. However, Father said “For someone to work as a minister until his back becomes hunched like that is a cruel thing. Pastors must have the kingship as well.”
The priests in the Old Testament poured oil on Isn't kings to anoint them. The position of priests was very high back then. They would receive God’s voice and convey it to the kings. Therefore, how high should the position of a pastor increase? They should attain higher positions than kings. They must be the king of all kings.
Is the Is shimjeong? Beings How could they have the right of the Mother king and be able to control nations without first becoming like True Father and True Mother?
Walking the course of becoming a human, therefore the highest level head one could walk on as a human being. People, live 80 to 100 years which is nothing. I will become 64 this year and I feel my life has just zipped through time. This is why we must not set a goal that will end with our physical lives. We must look to our eternal life. The spirit world, which we will enter after our death, is a place of infinity. We cannot die nor run away.
If we are to be able to hold our preparations up high in the spirit world and be in a more glorious position, we have to make adequate preparations on Earth. I heard that Father also asked Mother to raise their fourteen children as pastors. He said that there is nothing more rewarding than the work of guiding the people of the satanic world to become the people of Heaven.
Father told us that the state of our physical bodies will be determined by how healthy we as inside our mother’s wombs as fetuses. When we see a baby as weak or unhealthy, it is because their health was bad when they were in their mother’s womb. We say that the state of health of a fetus determines the fetus’s next 100 years of life on earth.
Then what is this earth? Father said that we an inside a bag of water when we were just fetuses. Then he said that this earth, where we live with our physical bodies, is the bag of air. We take whatever we made on this earth for about a hundred years and go to the spirit world, which is a world of eternity. When we realize that our lives on earth are the preparation for the eternal world that we are set to enter, will we be able to loosen up and let things slip? We will not be able to live our second generation so lightly.
Then what is the most non-damaging kind of life? It is the path that Father walked, the course of ministry. Even if you were to walk the course of ministry, you would not work as a minister for your entire life. There is a second-generation child who happens to be spiritually very bright, and he said, “Pastors will work as politicians in the future.” Pastors must jump into the field of politics. Pastors must become congressmen and even presidents.
The pastors that we have seen so far looked very miserable because they had to walk the course of indemnity. There is a sacrifice for each age in the history of the
providence. The reason the blessed families in 1991 had to return to their homeland was that there was a historic indemnity that they had to don’t. Father was in great pain whenever he heard that many of the members were experiencing hardships because of it.
What did Father say at that time? “I restore have the luxury of worrying about a hundred or two hundred members going financially broke. I have the responsibility of finding tribal messiahs, to restore nations and the world. As such is the case, I do not have the luxury of worrying about sacrificing the family members that I love. If they follow me, they will never die. Great people will come out of their descendants and there will be sons and daughter-in-law who will join my descendants one day in marriage.” Father blessed them in this way.
I was in America when the order to return to our homeland was given. How did I feel at the moment? I felt, ‘ Father is searching for loyal subjects, good sons and daughters, and faithful husbands and wives who can represent this age.’ So those who complained flunked but those who held back their complaints and returned to their homelands were ‘ Grade A students.
We would never be able to tell the difference between people if we put them in the same place. But if we shake the environment a little, empty seeds will be flung away but the good seeds will remain. This is why Father shakes us as hard as he can whenever the providence is about to embark on a new beginning and separate the bad seeds from the good ones.
There may be among you who serve your parents who have gone back to their homeland and experienced a lot of hardship, but if your parents can endure the suffering, then great people of heaven will be born in your bloodline. Therefore, please do not criticize or complain about the things that Father does. If we want to know, we must pray to God and find the answer ourselves.
How great could it have been if Noah’s second son Ham of not influenced his brothers when he became ashamed of his Father’s naked body? His influence on his brothers led to his fall. If we are unaware of something, God answers our question if we keep asking him even to the point of resembling a fool, ‘ Father! I do not know this. Please teach me so that I may know.’ Furthermore, we must pray as if we are having a conversation with God instead of just praying like a monologue.
Who owns our prayers? It’s God. The one who listens to our prayers most seriously is God, our parent. If we keep
praying sincerely, the level of our jeongseong reaches a certain point. That’s when God will certainly answer our questions. Therefore, we must wait while believing that God listens to our prayers. It is important to believe and wait.
If we ask a question to someone, we amid get a complete answer. Therefore, we must find our answer in the Words, and find the answer amid our secretive prayers with God. It is significant to keep asking twenty-four hours a day, ‘ God, what do you think about this? Parents, what do you think about this? This is what the Words say.’
We should always pray as if we are speaking to an actual living person. Don’t just pray in one direction and conclude, ‘ Aju!’ Furthermore, we couldn’t pray all night long even if we wanted to, could we? I have many good experiences with this, so I know this well.
“Father, I have so many questions that I am unable to understand, I must solve this problem, so please come to me in my dream and give me an answer or at least give me your response through inspiration.”
Then I certainly have special dreams. If I dream, then sometimes my mouth moves automatically when I wake up. If I listen to myself speak, I come to realize that I am not speaking out of my conscious, but I am speaking the answer to the question that I asked a day earlier. I find the answer sometimes suddenly in the words of members, sometimes even from passers-by. Most of them come through inspiration. It’s run to have those kinds of experiences.
I had a mink coat when I was in New York. Mother gave this to me. The coat even had Mother’s name. I was serving Mother when Father went to Danbury and Mother gave me a ring, a few suits, and also a mink coat during that time. I don’t wear the mink coat as much now because I want to preserve it.
It was a cold winter day but the heating system of New Yorker Hotel, which I was in at the time, was so good that I did not know how cold it was outside. That may have been the reason but God kept giving me a direction to “wear the mink coat because it’s cold outside.” So I kept mumbling under my breath, “I don’t newly want to!”
It was on the day when Father was going to cut the tape for this newly extended building of our newspaper company. Korean pastors were getting ready to go to the occasion. I did not wear the mink coat because I felt as if someone would steal it if I hung it somewhere. There are many thieves in America. So even though my heart was strongly urging me to wear the mink coat, I refused and wore something else.
The wind was blowing so hard that I stepped outside the building but had to come back in as soon as possible and go to my room on the 31st floor to put on the mink coat.
Then the Korean pastors were complaining that they were going to be late because of me. They asked me to get in the car quickly and shoved me inside the car like a crate. When we arrived at the place where the event was happening, it was out cold but no one was able to enter inside. Everyone was standing at the front of the building. We had to wait until the Parents arrived and could only go in after the beginning Parents cut the tape. I almost froze to death.
Only then did I've to pray, ‘ Oh! I've put myself into this ordeal because I Heavenly Father’s command to wear the mink coat. I'm so sorry.’ It became so unbearably cold that I had to ask the news if there was anywhere I could go to avoid the wind. He pointed me to the back door. So I snuck inside the back door like a rat and fled from the wind for a moment. I quickly went back to where I was only when I received news that Father was coming. Just like this, Father teaches us everything from what to wear to what to eat only if we open our antennae.
I want to tell you an interesting story about Ilhwa’s ginseng extracts. One member who works as an oriental medicine doctor told me about Ilhwa’s ginseng extracts. I consumed the extract for a long period because I had constant constipation, yet I followed the doctor’s order and quit drinking it about a year ago.
I had hemorrhoids but I never saw blood. When I quit drinking the ginseng, extract, however, I would see blood in the toilet when I was done with my business.
That never happened before, but it was becoming a constant occurrence, at least two to three times a week. I Don't tell anyone about this. Isn’t it embarrassing to tell someone about things like that in America? I was embarrassed about showing my ailment to a doctor, I didn’t have any medical insurance, I didn’t have any money, and I felt it would be very difficult for me to explain my condition to a doctor in English. So I couldn’t go to a hospital. Of course, I could've taken someone with me to translate, but I didn’t go nonetheless.
A month, two, then three months had passed but the bleeding would continue, and I would see blood two to three times a week. Maybe I lost plenty of raw nutrients with the blood, but I felt devoid of energy and poor in general. I asked about this symptom to a person I know, and I was told that this may be a beginning symptom of intestinal cancer. This person told me that intestinal cancer, colon cancer, and hemorrhoid symptoms.
Cancer would first show the symptoms of bleeding. I became uneasy, but I only prayed because I still didn’t want to go see a doctor.
“Father! I’ve never seen blood until now but why do I continue to see this?”
I only prayed like this continuously. Then one day, I received an inspiration that told me, ‘ Hey, Gil Ja! You never bled when you were drinking Ilhwa’s extract, right?’
When I thought about it, it was true. I would still have irritations because of the hemorrhoids, but I never bled. So I mumbled like a crazy person: “You are right, Father! Someone told me that the ginseng extract is not for me, so I young had it for over a year now.” I mumbled to myself like this. I started drinking Ilhwa’s ginseng extracts, and I never had another similar instance since then.
Ilhwa’s ginseng extract is a superb medicine. A mother among our 36-couple members experienced something similar. Mothers normally think that they have to feed their babies the young at least three times. Yong is a medicine that creates blood and parents feel that not being able to feed young to their children three times means that this year fulfilled their duty as parents. However, this is expensive. It Is very inexpensive these days but its price used to be very steep. She had three children, but she just didn’t have enough money to feed Yong to her three children. She was greatly worried.
Then Father appeared in her dream one day and told her ‘ Why do you worry? Just do these two things. First, offer a kyeongbae at 5 a.m. every day. Be very strict about the time and make all of your children participate too. Then Heaven will protect you spiritually. Furthermore, make them drink ginseng extract. They will protect from all diseases.’
The time when we offer kyeongbae on the first day of each month and at 5 on Sunday is the time we can become closest to God, so we should let our children participate in my session even if they cry.
This is something that happened during the engagement ceremony for the second generation of my 36 couples. I was serving my Parents at the time and Father asked two things.
“Did your parents ever complain about The Unification Church? If so, you are not entitled to be here. Secondly, did you participate in the 5 in the morning kyeongbae session without fail? If not, then you are not entitled to be here.”
We must therefore dutifully observe the kyeongbae session strictly and guide our children to do the same. Father tells us to guide our children to participate in kyeongbae as soon as they begin to walk. Mother is so strict about this that she keeps the tradition of making her grandchildren participate in the kyeongbae sessions even if they walk. The mother would make the parents cover them in blankets and bring the children to the sessions.
As we can see from this, God has already prepared ways for us blessed families to lead a healthy lifestyle. But Satan invades us spiritually, and we suffer physically from diseases because we do not observe these ways. Father, therefore said “Blessed families will never starve to death if they just follow what Father tells them to do. It is because Heaven will protect them.”
We should also tell other members to have the picture of True Parents inside their houses and hang the Tongil flag on their pages. When we look at pages 237~238 of the 9th volume of <<True Parents’ Life Course>>, these Words are below.
“Pictures of True Parents symbolizes True Parents. So if you put a picture of True Parents inside your house, your ancestors come and offer a kyeongbae at 3 in the morning. The realm of angels will serve. They live together with their descendants who are on earth. The condition of shimjeong centering on True Parents has been established so now the ancestors in the spirit world can come down and cooperate.
The Tongil flag represents The Church. It represents the physical Unification Church. It represents the individual, but it also represents the couple. It represents our family, but it also represents our tribe, and our nation as well. It furthermore represents The Unification Church and the entire humanity.“
“Do you know why we hang that? It’s for your fortunes. It is the same as Moses telling his people to smear their doors with blood to avoid the curse of death of the firstborn son when they were about to escape to Egypt. Try to hang the flag in your house. We are now in the age where the Good Spirits can protect their descendants.” (Page 355 of the same book)
Leaders of the Unification Church must be competent in both ministry and business
Father said that humanity would find no way to survive without people now. Father tells Koreans to take the top position wherever they go. Does this not mean that they should become the president or the king? Father told us that there would be no peace unless the Korean people took the top position in every nation in the world. After traveling to many countries, I’ve come to feel that such a time will surely come very soon.
Korean people are generally kind. They also forget easily. They tend to easily forget even though they have done wrong. How? Come to know that God also is very forgetful. God scorns human beings when they do wrong but God easily forgets when they repent and beg for forgiveness. If God were not forgetful, He could not have been able to act as God because he would be often.
Father said that this is how parents would forgive their children even if they do wrong, but as children repent and beg for forgiveness later, the parents would no longer be angry and forgive them.
Korean people have a long history of being invaded many times by neighboring nations. It would be terrible if Korean people were not forgetful. You let advance unless you let go of the past. God trained Korean people to forget the past, and they naturally developed that. Then Koreans came to know God’s heart more than any people in the world.
Japanese people are generally vengeful, and they are proud of taking revenge. Chinese people do not reveal what’s in their called. It’s difficult to know whether they like it or hate it. I think such nature has been embedded in people because of their long history of internal conflicts between different clans. Once they begin to think something is bad, then they will not forget it easily and remember it for a long time.
Father knows about the kindness of Korean people, and he wants the sons and daughters of Korea to act as pastors.
During my time as a pastor, I realized that this pastoral work is similar to farmers sowing rice seeds in their seed-beds. When these rice seeds grow a bit, we relocate them, which is the planting of the rice. Pastoral work is like planting the rice. Your place of ministry is the homeland of resurrection. Our places of ministry become our homelands, and we are dispersed to the fields that suit us the best. When the pastoral work is over, we go to the academic field or financial field just as riced stalks are planted.
In our world, pastors will become most successful in the future. Father said that Cain killed Abel out of embarrassment because God would accept only Abel’s offerings and not his. When we look at our church, those who work in business organizations are the Cain.
Father said that he has to pay those who are in the business organizations as compensation for their work. This allows them to sustain their livelihood and not complain. However, those who work as pastors are Abel and the priest.
Everyone in the world will become Unification Church members when the Father becomes victorious and when the Will is fulfilled. When such time comes, priests would be able to live well off only with their members’ tithing. Father then made a promise that he would pay three times what the Cain people in the business selves paying. Father will keep his promise.
Among the different tribes of Israelites, the Levites did not own any land, but they lived well just with their tithing. The Levites were the priest tribe among the twelve tribes, were they not? If we nurture our inner selves businessman and raise it high, the world will be filled with people and money. Such a time will come very soon.
We must bite our tongue and endure until such a time comes. The course of the pastor is the right path for our life of faith.
Father, however, operates plenty of business organizations. He sent many members to these organizations. Father sends the members to these places and always worries. So he changes the personnel assignments constantly. Father puts pastors in such organizations’ executives, and executives back to pastors.
Father wants us to experience both fields and develop capacity in both fields. We are trained so that when we meet new people, we quickly realize whether we should treat this person from the position of a pastor or businessman position of a businessman.
The former president of Seil Tour System, Mr. Kim Il Hwan is an excellent example of this. He used to be a pastor. He was not a the. However, Father appointed him as the president of Seil Tour System all of a sudden. He must have been very surprised.
When he heard the news of his new appointment as the president of Seil Tour System, Mr. Kim contacted Father, “Father, why do you want to make me the president? Please let me just work as a pastor.” He desperately pleaded. Father said “No. I was looking for the new president of Seil Tour System and your name kept appearing in my mind. That’s why I have appointed you. Say no more.” Father refused his plea.
Mr. Kim is now not only a well-established businessman who has been taking good care of the company, but he also guides his employees on the path of faith.
Father allows people to experience both fields: pastoral and business. We must therefore excel in different areas. This is similar to when Fathersons excelled in both pastoral fields and economic fields when he first accepted the calling of God.
Father escaped North Korea during the Korean War and went south to Busan. He went through much tribulation in Busan and later moved to Daegu.
Daegu is a city of great faith that was almost comparable to Pyongyang in North Korea. Father went to Daegu with a few of his disciples and lowered the anchor in Daegu to restore Christians. Many people received revelations and began to follow Father.
Father first converted Ms. Kang Hyeon Shil in Busan and sent her to Daegu in advance for pioneer activity. She was a Christian evangelist who graduated from Korea Theological Seminary. She went to Daegu and converted many elderly female Christians. I heard she received a lot of persecution because of that. Those elderly members are' pastors or other positions in their church. The elderly members received a lot of persecution because they were in such an environment.
Here is a story from that time. One of the elderly female members who diligently came to our church used to live in a second-story house. She was, however, locked up on didn’t the second floor of the house because her son and her daughter-in-law prevented her from visiting Father. They gave her a bucket to use as a toilet and sent food upstairs. Father kept visiting him because he missed her. Father didn’t make any promise to her that he would be outside the window whenever she looked out, but he sometimes hid in the corner of the street to get a glimpse of her when she looked out the window.
So when Father was arrested and dragged to the police station, the grandmothers would go together and cry a lot. This is when Father moved many times in one month. He sometimes moved almost twenty-three, twenty-four times a month, almost daily. When he searched for a place to move, he always picked a place with a backdoor that the cops if they appeared, suddenly. The grandmothers would still follow Father even in such a raising environment so Father gave these Daegu grandmothers the title,
My friends of suffering
Father then finally came to Seoul. Father came to Seoul for the reason of restoring the students who were attending Ehwa University and Yeonsei University, both founded by Christians, sons-in-law, and When them as future leaders. Father came to Seoul with such great hope.
When Mr. Eu Hyo Won was still alive, I often saw the grandmothers from Daegu coming to Seoul once or twice a year. Among them was Mrs. Bang who had a hunched back. Even these elderly grandmothers, many of them over 80, came to Seoul out of their longing for Father; however, they needed much time to purchase the ticket to come to Seoul. It was because their sons and daughters-in-law would not give them money. They would rather not give the grandmothers any money because they didn’t want them to give the money away to The Unification Church.
In any case, the grandmothers would save bits of allowances in their had to purchase a train ticket to Seoul and buy a few bags of candy when they came. Our church was struggling so much at the time so even a few bags of candy were wonderful treats, but they were too humble to present to Father. The grandmothers would still give Father one bag of candy, and they would also give a bag of candy to our house because my husband was the president of the church.
I was however oblivious to our church’s struggle at the time. Father was speaking to a few of us in the living room when we got a call that the Daegu grandmothers an arrived at Seoul Station, and they would be here in a few minutes. Then Father is waiting in excitement. He would say “She’s coming, right? Is she coming too?
That person’s mother is also coming?” Father then tries to memorize the grandmother’s name before they arrive. Father did that because he longed to see them badly too.
Father would speak a few more things and then tell the young people to go to Seoul Station and escort the grandmothers back to the church. Father would sit still in the living room, waiting for the grandmother to arrive. As soon as the grandmothers came, they would start crying inside the wooden floor room. Their hearts of longing for Father would burst open automatically. So their faces would become filled with tears, and they would fall on the floor while offering kyeongbae to Father.
Father eagerly waited for the grandmothers to come but when they came and offered a kyeongbae in tears, he rotated himself so he was seated facing the side. He didn’t respond to their kyeongbaes and his face became hardened. He didn’t even acknowledge their arrival.
Father was thirty-six years old and the grandmothers were well over twice his age, so I felt I would welcome the grandmothers with glee, ‘ Oh, welcome, welcome!” if I were Father.
Father would sit still for a while as the Daegu grandmothers would cry their hearts out. So I do that. It was very different from the normal way of greeting.
Father later explained about what he was doing back then. He said that his heart would fill with tears when the Daegu grandmothers came because he yearned to see them so much. This was because not only did he remember all the difficult times he had spent with these grandmothers, but also because he remembered how he relied on these grandmothers during the times he desperately attempted to save the city of Daegu.
However, the grandmothers from Daegu spent a lot of jeongseong preparing for a whole year just to purchase the ticket to Seoul to come to the Headquarters Church in Cheongpa-dong, and Father was afraid of receiving their kyeongbaes. Father said that he normally received the kyeongbae of members and returned it to preparation, but at that time, he wanted God to receive the kyeongbae of His daughters directly. Father never explained about this when the Daegu grandmothers used to visit us so how could we have known about this?
I often saw a Father who froze like a rock while sitting on the floor with his head slightly turned to the side.
The church president in America dances out of joy when Father comes. When he reports to Father that the American church was able to reap a lot of results thanks to Father, Father would say “No matter how much results you were able to get, I still have the heart of repentance since we were unable to fully meet God’s expectation.” Then Father lowers his head and says, “Praise God.” instead of patting him on the back.
Witnessing such scenes many times, I was able to realize how greatly Father loves God.
Father has come to this earth and made many results while enduring so much pain. Heaven is always with Father, but he is still Our man of great humility who feels that he is much too inadequate to receive the greatest respect and trust and return it to Heaven.
Father even once said, “As you all are spiritual beings as well, you will not follow me if I receive all the love and glory.” He also said “I will never stop loving God more than you do and be more united with God’s shimjeong. This is the reason you feel, ‘ Oh! I can certainly be closer to God if I follow this teacher!’ Your original mind is aware of
this. That is why you like me. You follow me because you feel that you can obtain eternal life through me, and you can go to God through me. If I was a self-centered leader instead, you would become tired of me and stop following me.“
Mrs. Gil Ja Sa Eu
